UnShaded Revelations

UR readers!

Let’s have a HEART to HEART:

As most of you know, ministry is NOT easy.  You rarely get off days, it’s hard to take a vacation, you deal with others’ problems, you are expected to exhibit Christian-like behavior (even when others don’t do the same)…oftentimes, ministry plans supersede home plans…you are always busy…even when you don’t look busy, you’re most likely planning for the next thing…let’s not forget to add work and family life into the equation annnnd all of the craziness that comes with just existing.  Life is crazy, so add ministry to that equation and you get UTTER CRAZINESS!!!

If this is just the life of someone who works in ministry, can we imagine the life of the Pastor (his wife and family)? The toll ALL of this takes on them (individually and collectively), the time it takes away from home, the time it takes away from their quality time, the time it takes away
from their children, the time it takes away from them to just be…

Those that know me know I’m the encourager…the motivator…the supporter…if I can do ANYTHING to help…I’m there…So you must know that when it comes to my husband…I’m double…triple…quadruple (to infinity and beyond) all of these things. AND his schedule can get pretty hectic; I don’t miss a thing.  This is the way I see it: if he can get up day in and day out to make a living (as do I) to support our household, study to complete his degrees, study and teach Bible Study, host his radio show, complete counseling sessions, study and prepare sermons week after week, the LEAST I can do is show up, do my part and SUPPORT! 

Please don’t misunderstand, I love playing the supporting role to my Pastor husband.  Here’s my quandary in all of this: As parishioners, laymen, congregation members (whatever term you would like to use to describe yourself), do we do all we can do to support and/or aid the Pastor?  I’ve been in the church all my life and not once, can I think of a time where my family or myself (when I became grown) did anything to show our Pastor (and/or his wife) our appreciation?  I mean, yes we had the traditional “Pastor & Wife’s Anniversary” but we all know it is nothing in comparison to what these men and women deal with.

I’m sure I have some that are/were immediately turned off by what I’ve just typed and that is absolutely fine with me. It just means you weren’t ready to receive it or you’re not capable of understanding the perspective. If your mind immediately went to monetary, then we’re clearly not on the same page.

Even as the wife of a Pastor, I don’t think I’ll ever be able to fully grasp/understand his perspective.  I can empathize to a certain extent, but never will I completely understand.  When I said the things he deals with affect home life, it does.  The phone never stops ringing; there is no respect of time, home life, etc. Most times, some people don’t even want anything MAJOR.  I remember growing up I was told it wasn’t respectful to call people’s homes after 7pm, then later it became 9pm. With the way technology is setup, none of that matters anymore.  I’m sure someone is reading and saying “You knew that when you married him”…you’re right, I did, but is that supposed to make it any better?”.  I have the same wants, needs, and desires as the next man’s wife, but understanding the calling on my husband’s (and mine) life, sometimes those wants, needs and desires get put on hold.  

If you are the Pastor’s wife and you’re dealing with this: YOU ARE NOT ALONE! I won’t tell you it’s easy, but you can make it…Joshua 1:9 admonishes us to “Be strong and courageous because the Lord, thy God is with you”…One of my favorite scriptures that pushes me to go further is 2 Corinthians 12:9 – But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Continue to be YOUR Man of God’s Cover Girl: Cover him in prayer, Cover him in love, Cover him in the good times and bad…it’s just like the traditional wedding vows: in sickness, health…for better or worse…cover him til death parts you…

Sidenote: Please understand the “I Love my Pastor, but I dislike his wife” spill is OLD.  When you choose to disrespect her, you’ve disrespected the Pastor “that you LOVE SO MUCH”…Understand that while you THINK it goes unnoticed…BOTH have noticed and have taken it into account…WHY? Because they are ONE! You can definitely not like someone, but always do what is right…be respectful of him, her, their marriage and their position…